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I Don’t Understand God

September 25, 2014


I think the more I know God the less I understand Him, and I think that’s a good thing. Knowing there is nothing so bad I have ever done or will do that He won’t still love me is incomprehensible. Knowing there is nothing so good I have done or will do that will make Him love me any more is humbling!

Who am I showing that same kind of love to? Who do I love so much that no matter what they do or don’t do I will love them just the same? It’s so hard to grasp. We try to earn everything in this life ranging from our paycheck for our performance to the approval of others for insignificant things like our appearance. Christians tend to transfer that into our spiritual lives by trying to prove our worthiness to God. All He really wants is our love. Nothing we can do on our own will earn His love. He gives it to us freely and that truly blows me away.

Like I said earlier, I can’t understand God. I just want to bask in His love long enough that it pours out of me toward everyone I connect with in this life. I want to remember day by day, even moment by moment, the awestruck feeling I have right now. God loved me enough before I even existed to send His son Jesus to die in my place. I can never understand that and I can never thank Him enough. I feel now more than ever how completely inadequate I am in my own strength to do anything for Him. I’ve studied His word and have my beliefs, but I feel the key is more in just loving Him, not being pinned down by all the what’s so much. Give God the love a young child gives their parent.

I pray the natural worldly habits of judging those around me will leave and I can learn to love them just the way they are. It will be a battle, but if I can remember God loves me with all my flaws, I should be able to show them His love through me. When I realize I don’t deserve God’s love, why would I force others to earn my love? I need to quit worrying so much about trying to be the perfect person in man’s eye and remember God chooses the rejected.

Matthew 18:3-4     Psalm 131:2    Mark 10:15    Genesis 29 & 30

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